Louis DeJoy's tombstone

Louis DeJoy is so happy!

Louis DeJoy is happy because he loves his new job: destroying the United States Postal Service. 

Also because he has a wife and two wonderful children, who, like all Republican children, don't need clean air and clean water.

On the sad day after their father's death, his children will of course bring flowers to his grave, where his tombstone will proudly read: "I Destroyed My Country's Post Office to Help Reelect the Worst President in United States History."

They will also take pride in the family foundation that finances the Jesse Helms Center in honor of the late senator from North Carolina who opposed black civil rights, women's rights, rights for the disabled, gay rights, abortion rights, and other liberal attempts to undermine "our nation's founding principles."